Month: May 2016

Who the hell is Bucky?

Posted on by lothloripen

[Note: occasionally I indulge myself and rant about my current obsessions. This is one such occasion. The following contains spoilers from all 3 Captain America movies.]

Warning: this post contains a LOT of gifs. And pictures. Screenshots. Everything. I couldn’t help myself!

So I am a huge Marvel fan. And my favourite characters are always morally ambiguous, dark, and broken. Bucky Barnes is the perfect example. He is one of my three favourites in the superheroes franchise (the other two being Loki and Magneto), and with the recent amazing debut of Civil War, my love for him is at an all-time high. But it wasn’t always this way…

The first time I watched Captain America: The First Avenger was such a long time ago that I don’t even remember what I thought of it. At that point I was more interested in cute little Steve (or cute big Steve) to pay much attention to his BFF. By the time The Winter Soldier rolled around, I had completely forgotten that there was more than one character in The First Avenger.

So when the internet went a bit crazy over Bucky, I was left thinking “Who the hell is Bucky?” Which, turns out, was exactly the right reaction.tumblr_nnf3a0xbw31qc2fi0o8_r1_500

When I watched The Winter Soldier at long last, and this terrifying assassin with a metal arm took off his mask, my first thought was ‘Wow, he’s actually pretty cute’ followed by ‘Is this the Bucky?’

The point is, I should have auditioned for the Winter Soldier. My memory was about as good as his.

Even though Sebastian Stan had about 3 lines the entire movie, he didn’t need to talk at all for the emotion to shine through. Several brutal brainwashing sessions and agonising screams was all it took for my heart to break. And those red-rimmed eyes will haunt me in my dreams. Sebastian has more emotion in his eyes than most people have in their entire body.

By the time we reached the climax, I was already cheering for Steve to rescue Bucky even though that guaranteed certain death – I didn’t really think this through, and clearly neither did Steve. I left the cinema with a crushed heart but on a euphoric high. The Winter Soldier became my favourite Marvel movie to date, and Bucky Barnes a close contender with my original favourite Loki.

So despite having walked into The Winter Soldier with no idea what it was about, I went into Civil War with sky-high expectations. I had all these scenarios in my mind about how Steve was going to find Bucky, how Bucky was going to react, how exactly the civil war was going to get started.

For some reason, none of those scenarios included Sebastian Stan speaking Romanian. Or buying plums, for that matter.

So in some senses Civil War blew my expectations out of the water. The fight scenes were superb (as always), everyone’s acting on point (of course), and the Steve-meets-Bucky scene absolutely stunning. The climax was the absolute standout – I could have cut the tension with a shard of ice. And Bucky’s scream of fury as he tries to tear the arc reactor out of Tony’s chest is out of this world amazing.

There were also some parts which weren’t up to my ridiculously high standard. The bromance between Steve and Bucky (such as actual ‘talking’) was lacking, there were too many characters that shifted the spotlight away from my Bucky, and for most of the movie Bucky did nothing but run away. Which is the sensible thing to do, I applaud him, but it could have been managed better. Oh well. A movie can’t be perfect, after all.

Civil War not only divided the Avengers, but also the fandom. I’ve had plenty of arguments over #TeamCap or #TeamIronMan with some of my closest friends. Most importantly, it divided my values. I value accountability from powerful groups such as the Avengers (or our government), and I believe the United Nations – so theoretically I should be on Tony’s team.

It takes a powerful character for me to abandon my values for him. At the moment, I would abandon everything for him. #TeamCap forever!

(On a slight sidetrack, #SayNoToHYDRACap is on twitter at the moment, and without going on a long rant about this as well, I’ll just add this: NO NO NO NO NO NO NEVER)

I look forward to… whatever movie Bucky is in when he unfreezes again, dammit. In the meantime, I will content myself with watching dorky Sebastian Stan interviews.

Separate worlds

Posted on by lothloripen

I peer into the gloom as I walk by.
The place is empty, it is barely noon.
The tall tables standing silent,
the taps behind the bar sitting with unease
as though daylight brings uncertainty
that was shrouded by the night.
The beer-stains on the carpet,
the ever-present stench of fermented grapes
permeating from every pore of the room;this is his world, not mine.

At night the crowds flock like rowdy birds
The seats are filled, the taps run free.
He sashays across the room on unsteady feet,
disarms with a smile,
orders the usual.
The room is brighter through beer-coloured lenses,
the laughter infectious,
the chatter reaching a crescendo as
he turns to the crowd and yells,
“My shout!”

Amidst those roars of approval he finds
solace for a while,
body pressed tight around his newfound friends,
the room awash with mirth and colour,
an electrified buzzing undercurrent in his veins.
A woman in a corner catches his eye,
dark locks cascading past her shoulders,
a bright red lipstick stain on her glass.
It occurs to him that everything is blurred
except for her eyes.

In the morning he dresses and leaves
before she can wake.
Shirt inside-out, shoelaces undone,
he steps into the dawning world
with nothing but faint recollections.
On the streets he passes men in suits
and suddenly remembers his unwashed hair,
his sweat-stained shirt,
the cold wind that numbs his heart and
tears him apart from within.

I smile at him if I walk by,
and I would know him, if I could,
but he and I live in separate worlds
and perhaps that is for the best.

[‘He’ is not real, but that does not mean he doesn’t exist]

If on an autumn’s day a poet

Posted on by lothloripen

[Title adapted from Italo Calvino’s If On A Winter’s Night A Traveler]

Sit still.
Lay back.
Watch the world go by.
Do you feel it?
Travel with time,
don’t resist it
Feel the seconds tick by.
Count them like the strands of your
hair between your fingers.
Them let them go.Park3.jpg

The birds chatter and hum like
bickering siblings.
A dog barks. Insistently. Consistently.
His sister frolics on the grass like a newborn.
Two pigeons chase each other around my seat.
Nothing is still.
The rolling wheels of a pram,
the crunch of a child’s shoe on autumn leave,
the splashing of water fountains like a sudden launching of rockets,
the woman running along the field with not a care to the world.

Park 2

Do you feel it?
This is living.
You too are part of this scene.
Leaning on a table of stone,
pen in hand,
eyes alternating between the book and the expanse of grass.
Take a breath.
It’s time to go.
Let this life pass you by.
It will be here
eternally
on a forgotten horizon
just out of your reach.

Park 1

[Written on my lunch break at Redfern Park, Sydney]

A concert of monsters and men

Posted on by lothloripen

“Howling ghosts they reappear
in mountains that are stacked with fear
but you’re a king and I’m a lionheart”

King and Lionheart, Of Monsters and Men

OMAM Concert 3

We filed in.
Not single file, but as
a wave that swept upon the harbour
and up those familiar steps.The crowd pressed us
closely
from every side surrounded
by those likeminded friends
with whom we share this house of opera
tonight.

OMAM concert 4

The seats are filled.
The crowd stirs,
impatient and restless, the chatter
overflows like wine poured by a careless hand.
We watch the bare stage
with rapt attention
as though through wishing
our dreams would appear.

They are here.
Gliding onto the stage like dark shadows
robed in mist,
taking positions with
practiced nonchalance.
We who have waited with baited breath
let excitement roll forth
with a stampede of applause.

OMAM Concert 1

The band begins
with drums like claps of thunder
and two voices
unearthly in their beauty
blending with perfect harmony.
On that night
I might have sworn Iheard angels sing.

Let the music wash over you
Like dark clouds on a summer’s day.
Bask in the fleeting,
the momentary,
masterpiece of art.
For after that, all that will remain
are photos and videos and memories
that just aren’t quite right.

OMAM Concert 2

[I’m trying a new form of poetry blogging – please bear with me.]